Today in San Francisco at the Proposition 8 Trial, Ryan Kendall testified to his own personal experience in an ex-gay cult called NARTH at their facility in Encino, CA, which is just north of San Diego. Despite our stories for over 40 years, gay kids are still joining these cults, whether by their own free will, manipulation, blackmail, or even force.
Plaintiffs' counsel Flynn led the direct investigation.
[Note: K = Kendall, F = Flynn]
K: I am an NCIC agent, it is a database maintained by the FBI. I have a secure clearance for this work.
Flynn: When were you born?
K: 1983.
F: 26 years old?
K: Yes.
F: School?
K: Evangelical Christian University.
F: How did you hear about homosexuality?
K: Proposition 2 in Colorado where I was raised.
F: Did your family talk about it?
K: Yes, it was very scare, homosexuality was wrong and evil and threatened our family, my parents said.
F: What is your sexual orientation?
K: I am a gay man.
F: How long have you known that?
K: Since I was 12 years old.
F: How did you feel when you realised you were gay?
K: ...and what your family and community did NOT like this concept, so I kept it a secret, hidden away from everyone.
F: What names were you called?
K: Homo, faggot, queer
[This shows that our natural comportment gives us away even if we don't tell a soul about our natural sexuality]
F: What else happened?
K: Played keep-away with my glasses and broke them.
F: What was it like being in that Christian School?
K: They were taunting me with a word that was so close to the truth. My parents changed schools.
F: When did your parents find out you were gay?
K: My parents discovered my journal when I was 13.
[His parents did not respect his privacy, nor his boundaries -- for they obviously read the journal.]
F: What happened?
K: My parents flipped out, they yelled, it was pretty scary the way they reacted.
F: Do you remember anything they said?
K: My mom said I was going to burn in Hell.
F: Was your family religious?
K: Yes, Church was a big part of our lives.
F: How did you feel when your mom said that?
K: I was totally stunned. I could not believe I was eternally damned.
F: What therapy did your parents send you to?
K: I was sent to a "Christian therapist" who would make me a heterosexual.
F: How many times did you go?
K: I went two or three times.
F: Did you recall much?
K: Inconsistent with Christian teachings, disapproved my parents, and that I was a bad person and evil.
F: How bad did you feel?
K: I always wanted to please my parents, now I was a bad and evil kid.
F: Was therapy successful? Did it make you heterosexual?
K: No, I was still gay.
F: Did you try to be straight?
K: No I knew I was gay the way I know I am short and half-Hispanic.
F: Next, where did you go?
K: NARTH: National Association of Reparative Therapy for Homosexuality, Encino, CA...
F: For how long?
K: Two, three years, 14 to 16.
F: How was your home life?
K: It was like night and day. My parents used to take me to school, make notes and put them in lunch, pick me up. Afterwards they called me names and that they hated me and that I was disgusting. My mom told me she wishes she'd had an abortion instead of a gay son, or Down's Syndrome or a retarded kid... instead of a gay son, me.
[Interesting, how the parents' unconditional love turned to unadulterated hate. They should be ashamed of themselves.]
F: Who at NARTH?
K: Joseph Nicolosi, Executive Director of NARTH.
F: Where did you meet with him?
K: Over the phone, an hour, 90 minutes. Then travelled to California.
F: What did you talk about?
K: Homosexuality is incompatible with Christian teachings, and not what your parents want for you.
F: Advice how to repress homosexuality?
K: No specific advice, just general admonishments.
[Just like my experience in the Boston Church of Christ! "Homosexuality will lead you to a bad lifestyle, you'll catch diseases and AIDS, you'll meet an early demise blah blah blah and then you're going to hell!" The only so-called "advice" they gave me was to pray, "Lord deliver me from these lusts!," and the like. Fat lot of good that did. I almost became an Atheist because of them.]
F: How did your NARTH experience help you reconcile your gayness and your faith?
K: At NARTH I was told I was dirty and bad, the therapy played no role in making me better or healthier.
F: Were you straight when you were done?
K: Just as gay as when I started.
F: Why did you stop going?
K: My life had fallen apart: my faith, my family, everything. If I did not stop going to NARTH, I wouldn't survive. I would kill myself.
[And by suiciding, he could have exiled himself into the Outer Darkness!]
F: How were you able to stop?
K: At 16 I surrendered myself to the Colorado Department of Children.
F: How does that work?
K: I told a social worker I was going to kill myself if I didn't leave my parents. They strated an abuse and neglect proceeding against my parents.
F: How was that?
K: I was incredibly suicidal, I turned to drugs to escape reality, things did not get better, I had lost everything.
F: How long did this period last?
K: Four to five years.
F: How did you support yourself?
K: It was a struggle.
F: On Public benefits?
K: I had to go to the emergency room for health care.
[This is why we need a National Health Service with a network of clinics for the uninsured. Instead we get Obama-Romneycare! But that's a different subject.]
F: How long have you worked for the Denver Police Department?
K: two to three years now.
F: Are you stable and can you support yourself?
K: Yes, it has been really hard, but I have been able to do that.
F: Just a couple more questions. Are you aware of organisations that are supportive of gay rights?
K: Yes. I am a member of Log Cabin Republicans, and a member of Denver Commission on LGBT Rights.
F: Are you testifying for them or you?
K: For myself, Ryan Kendall.
F: Have these organisations shaped your testimony?
K: No.
F: No more questions.
[Cross examination]
Campbell for the Defendant-Intervenor
C: Do you live in California?
K: No.
[But he went to the NARTH cult facility in Encino and even if he didn't, this is relevant.]
C: Did you participate in No on Proposition 8?
K: No.
C: Were you contacted by the San Francisco City Attorney's Office, yes?
[So Ryan Kendall knows someone in San Fran! (-: ]
K: Yes, in October.
C: Have you studied human sexuality?
K: No.
C: Have you known people who profess to have changed their sexual orientation?
K: In public, yes.
C: Were you compelled by your parents to go to conversion therapy?
K: Yes.
C: It was all your parents, without your consent?
K: Yes.
C: You told your parents your objections.
K: I told my parents and my therapist.
C: But that did not matter?
K: Yes, it did not.
C: Did you have the goal of changing your sexual attraction?
K: Yes, I just wanted to survive it.
C: But your goal was not to change.
K: No.
C: You talked about things your parents said to you?
K: Yes.
C: But your family experience was just as damaging as the therapy itself?
K: Yes, I said that.
[Of course it would be! What do people expect, when unconditional love turns to unadulterated hate?]
C: At some point your parents lost custody with you?
K: Yes.
C: After that, did you go back to live with your parents when you were 18?
K: Yes, briefly.
C: Some people volunteer and choose to go into conversion therapy?
K: That's not my experience.
C: So no one has ever gone to conversion therapy voluntarily?
K: I don't know EVERYONE; but in my experience, no.
C: But you have acknowledged that some people have success with conversion therapy?
K: I don't know that.
REDIRECT:
F: Have you met anyone who succeeded in conversion therapy?
K: Yes, Nicolosi trotted out his perfect patient, named Kelly, who (when the doctor left the room) told me he was going to a gay bar that night and was pretending success in conversion for his family.
[HA! So not only are these ex-gay ministries cults, they are scams.]
F: You said you went back to our parents when you were 18?
K: Briefly.
F: And do you talk to your parents now?
K: No.
[Why should he? They proved to him that they were horrible parents after discovering his sexuality.]
No more questions.
Showing posts with label The Outer Darkness. Show all posts
Showing posts with label The Outer Darkness. Show all posts
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
Sunday, January 3, 2010
Messages of Encouragement.
These are messages of encouragement that I have posted in the guestbook here.
Per Travis Swanson's request, I am reposting them below. You can post other letters of encouragement by clicking here, scrolling down the webpage and click on the link to sign the guestbook.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Date: 12-24-2009
Location: US
Message: Soon Bryce will realise that his same-sex attractions will simply neer go away. I hope by then he will be at a point in his life that he will be strong enough to resist his parents' totally misguided demands and will be able to set out on life on his own.
And I am appalled at his parents who acted so horribly towards him, stole his space and privacy, kidnapped him [bear with me I'm applying rape theory here] and eventually crushed his spirit! They devastated four people, including Bryce himself. :( :'(
Date: 12-24-2009
Location: US
Message: If you're reading this, Bryce, NEVER GIVE UP. Travis loves you deeply and misses you very greatly. :'(
Date: 12-25-2009
Location: US
Message: Bryce, if you are reading this, I hope you're in a place where you are well and are not under duress in anyway. I hope you are having a Merry Christmas. :) Stay strong; Travis loves you and is still here for you. You also have family members who love you unconditionally and are horrified at what you have been and maybe are still being put through. Despite what "Christian" theology and professing Christians may tell you, who and what you are including your sexuality is NOT a sin!
Date: 12-26-2009
Location: US
Message: Bryce,
What they are doing to you is horrible! :'-( I wish I knew exactly where in what city and which ministry you are being held as a POW of the Culture Wars in: for then I would do everything in my power to find you when they let you out whether it's for a few hours or at the end of the treatment. I would introduce you to my partner Andrew as well. Some who have gone through this have had their authentic self ruined and replaced by a hollow shell shellacked with an "approved" veneer, and their spirit crushed. Don't let this happen! Tell them what they want to hear without believing "any" of it and you'll get out with your spirit and soul intact. Travis is waiting for you! Hang on, you can make it! :thumbsup:
Travis,
I know these are trying times for you as well. I have full faith Bryce will make it through and be restored to you before 2010 runs out. I will be a "prayer warrior" for you guys and also for Bryce's mom, that she will realise what she's done and repent and ask Bryce his forgiveness. Don't despair, Bryce will be with you soon!
And to both: Christians don't know what they're talking about when they say being gay is a sin. They don't know historic meanings of words and historic (mis)understandings of sexuality. They also overlook the examples of David and Johnathan, Ruth and Naomi, Daniel and Asphenaz and most importantly for Bryce, Jesus ans St John (the beloved disciple).
Mrs. Faulkner, if you are reding this, please take heed!
Date: 12-27-09
Location: US
Message: Happy Kwanzaa! Today is also Boxing day for the Anglosphere outside these United States, when presents are exchanged and opened up. But for you and Travis, this has been postponed until next August; then you and Travis can give fully of yourselves to each other. May God speed that day!
Stay strong, Bryce, you can make it!
Edward :) ;)
Date: 12-28-2009
Location: US
Message: Bryce and Travis,
Hang in there! God knows your love for each other is most special; He will not cast it aside like used kleenex, but rather, bless it.
And to Mr. and Mrs. Faulkner,
If you are reading this, please please PLEASE read I Samuel 18 through II Samuel 1, King james Version. Research the meaning of the original Hebrew if you feel that you have to -- Strong's Exhaustive Concordance is an excellent tool for understanding. I believe you two will "get it," that you will know how Bryce and Travis love one another (II Samuel 1:26). :)
Because believe it or not, what you did to bryce and by extension Travis ands his family actually caused me to research homosexuality in the Bible. As a result, my failt in Christ reconstituted itself after being shattered in the late 1980s by the Boston Church of Christ, then a mind-control cult and by extension an ad-hoc ex-gay ministry. I had to figure out for myself that trying to deny or change my own sexuality (while in that cult) was not salvation by grace, but by works. :)
Date: 12-28-2009
Location: US
Message: One more thing, Mr. and Mrs. Faulkner,
The research that I did led me to the most joyful conclusion that denying or changing my sexuality NO MATTER WHAT is salvation by works instead of Grace.
And we all know where salvation by works leads to...
Date: 12-30-2009
Location: US
Message: Bryce and Travis,
I just saw a wonderful video over at YouTube. It's titled: "Cute gay Lovers, reunited after 3 months so beautiful" :'-)
This is what you'll have, in eight short months!
Date: 12-31-2009
Location: US
Message: Travis and Bryce,
It hurts to know that the two of you will not be sharing this New Years Eve together. Have faith, you'll make it!
Date: 01-02-10
Location: US
Message: Travis and Bryce,
Happy New Year! The two of you will be back together in eight short months. I can feel it in my bones!
The Lord will lead you, Bryce, to the Biblical account of david and Johnathan and their relationship and how He blessed it, as many times as He deems necessary. He will lead your mom to the exact same message and she will KNOW that she acted exactly as Saul did and sinned greatly (she shall repent and to God be the Glory!)... for how long did she know about and looked on with approval until that fateful day she found out that you, Bryce, were planning on coming out? My suspicion is, she knew about and looked upon the relationship between the two of you with favor the whole time.
So Travis, don't you worry. I discussed this with my partner what I know about Bryce's last message to you and we both agree that it was Bryce's mom talking. Bryce himself was probably heartened that there are websites dedicated to him! Bryce will resist their negativity, Bryce will definitely come out stronger! :)
Date: 01-02-10
Location: US
Message: To Mr. and Mrs. Faulkner:
If you are reding this, please please PLEASE pray and read I Samuel 18:1 through II Samuel 1:26 and II Samuel 9:3-8 (I like the King James Version) and let God speak to you concerning David and Johnathan. Research the meaning of the original Hebrew if you feel that you have to -- Strong's Exhaustive Concordance is an excellent tool for understanding. I believe you two will "get it," that you will know exactly how Bryce and Travis love one another (ex: II Samuel 1:26).
Because believe it or not, what you did Bryce and by extension Travis and his family actually caused me to research homosexuality in the Bible. As a result, my faith in Christ reconstituted itself after being shattered in the late 1980s by the Boston Church of Christ, then a mind-control cult and by extension an ad-hoc ex-gay ministry. I had to figure out for myself that trying to deny or change my own sexuality no matter whet was not salvation by grace, but by works.
I am fully convinced that once you realise Bryce cannot change his own sexuality without endangering his own salvation, you will swiftly repent, make amends and ask forgiveness from Bryce and Travis.
And to God be ALL the Glory! :thumbsup: :)
Per Travis Swanson's request, I am reposting them below. You can post other letters of encouragement by clicking here, scrolling down the webpage and click on the link to sign the guestbook.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Date: 12-24-2009
Location: US
Message: Soon Bryce will realise that his same-sex attractions will simply neer go away. I hope by then he will be at a point in his life that he will be strong enough to resist his parents' totally misguided demands and will be able to set out on life on his own.
And I am appalled at his parents who acted so horribly towards him, stole his space and privacy, kidnapped him [bear with me I'm applying rape theory here] and eventually crushed his spirit! They devastated four people, including Bryce himself. :( :'(
Date: 12-24-2009
Location: US
Message: If you're reading this, Bryce, NEVER GIVE UP. Travis loves you deeply and misses you very greatly. :'(
Date: 12-25-2009
Location: US
Message: Bryce, if you are reading this, I hope you're in a place where you are well and are not under duress in anyway. I hope you are having a Merry Christmas. :) Stay strong; Travis loves you and is still here for you. You also have family members who love you unconditionally and are horrified at what you have been and maybe are still being put through. Despite what "Christian" theology and professing Christians may tell you, who and what you are including your sexuality is NOT a sin!
Date: 12-26-2009
Location: US
Message: Bryce,
What they are doing to you is horrible! :'-( I wish I knew exactly where in what city and which ministry you are being held as a POW of the Culture Wars in: for then I would do everything in my power to find you when they let you out whether it's for a few hours or at the end of the treatment. I would introduce you to my partner Andrew as well. Some who have gone through this have had their authentic self ruined and replaced by a hollow shell shellacked with an "approved" veneer, and their spirit crushed. Don't let this happen! Tell them what they want to hear without believing "any" of it and you'll get out with your spirit and soul intact. Travis is waiting for you! Hang on, you can make it! :thumbsup:
Travis,
I know these are trying times for you as well. I have full faith Bryce will make it through and be restored to you before 2010 runs out. I will be a "prayer warrior" for you guys and also for Bryce's mom, that she will realise what she's done and repent and ask Bryce his forgiveness. Don't despair, Bryce will be with you soon!
And to both: Christians don't know what they're talking about when they say being gay is a sin. They don't know historic meanings of words and historic (mis)understandings of sexuality. They also overlook the examples of David and Johnathan, Ruth and Naomi, Daniel and Asphenaz and most importantly for Bryce, Jesus ans St John (the beloved disciple).
Mrs. Faulkner, if you are reding this, please take heed!
Date: 12-27-09
Location: US
Message: Happy Kwanzaa! Today is also Boxing day for the Anglosphere outside these United States, when presents are exchanged and opened up. But for you and Travis, this has been postponed until next August; then you and Travis can give fully of yourselves to each other. May God speed that day!
Stay strong, Bryce, you can make it!
Edward :) ;)
Date: 12-28-2009
Location: US
Message: Bryce and Travis,
Hang in there! God knows your love for each other is most special; He will not cast it aside like used kleenex, but rather, bless it.
And to Mr. and Mrs. Faulkner,
If you are reading this, please please PLEASE read I Samuel 18 through II Samuel 1, King james Version. Research the meaning of the original Hebrew if you feel that you have to -- Strong's Exhaustive Concordance is an excellent tool for understanding. I believe you two will "get it," that you will know how Bryce and Travis love one another (II Samuel 1:26). :)
Because believe it or not, what you did to bryce and by extension Travis ands his family actually caused me to research homosexuality in the Bible. As a result, my failt in Christ reconstituted itself after being shattered in the late 1980s by the Boston Church of Christ, then a mind-control cult and by extension an ad-hoc ex-gay ministry. I had to figure out for myself that trying to deny or change my own sexuality (while in that cult) was not salvation by grace, but by works. :)
Date: 12-28-2009
Location: US
Message: One more thing, Mr. and Mrs. Faulkner,
The research that I did led me to the most joyful conclusion that denying or changing my sexuality NO MATTER WHAT is salvation by works instead of Grace.
And we all know where salvation by works leads to...
Date: 12-30-2009
Location: US
Message: Bryce and Travis,
I just saw a wonderful video over at YouTube. It's titled: "Cute gay Lovers, reunited after 3 months so beautiful" :'-)
This is what you'll have, in eight short months!
Date: 12-31-2009
Location: US
Message: Travis and Bryce,
It hurts to know that the two of you will not be sharing this New Years Eve together. Have faith, you'll make it!
Date: 01-02-10
Location: US
Message: Travis and Bryce,
Happy New Year! The two of you will be back together in eight short months. I can feel it in my bones!
The Lord will lead you, Bryce, to the Biblical account of david and Johnathan and their relationship and how He blessed it, as many times as He deems necessary. He will lead your mom to the exact same message and she will KNOW that she acted exactly as Saul did and sinned greatly (she shall repent and to God be the Glory!)... for how long did she know about and looked on with approval until that fateful day she found out that you, Bryce, were planning on coming out? My suspicion is, she knew about and looked upon the relationship between the two of you with favor the whole time.
So Travis, don't you worry. I discussed this with my partner what I know about Bryce's last message to you and we both agree that it was Bryce's mom talking. Bryce himself was probably heartened that there are websites dedicated to him! Bryce will resist their negativity, Bryce will definitely come out stronger! :)
Date: 01-02-10
Location: US
Message: To Mr. and Mrs. Faulkner:
If you are reding this, please please PLEASE pray and read I Samuel 18:1 through II Samuel 1:26 and II Samuel 9:3-8 (I like the King James Version) and let God speak to you concerning David and Johnathan. Research the meaning of the original Hebrew if you feel that you have to -- Strong's Exhaustive Concordance is an excellent tool for understanding. I believe you two will "get it," that you will know exactly how Bryce and Travis love one another (ex: II Samuel 1:26).
Because believe it or not, what you did Bryce and by extension Travis and his family actually caused me to research homosexuality in the Bible. As a result, my faith in Christ reconstituted itself after being shattered in the late 1980s by the Boston Church of Christ, then a mind-control cult and by extension an ad-hoc ex-gay ministry. I had to figure out for myself that trying to deny or change my own sexuality no matter whet was not salvation by grace, but by works.
I am fully convinced that once you realise Bryce cannot change his own sexuality without endangering his own salvation, you will swiftly repent, make amends and ask forgiveness from Bryce and Travis.
And to God be ALL the Glory! :thumbsup: :)
Against Ex-Gay Cults
I have not posted in a long, long time. During this time, my Christian faith, which had utterly shattered in the late 80s thanks to the mind-control tactics of the Boston Church of Christ, reconstituted itself. This had to be a doing of God: the all-encompassing all and Lord of all.
Well anyway, I had come across a bunch of videos about Ex-Gay "ministries" on YouTube. Upon further investigation, I had found they engage in far more destructive techniques, including far more controlling mind-control techniques than Kip McKean could have ever possibly imagined.
The story of one of the "clients" of these "ministries" -- Bryce Faulkner -- really broke my heart. I was literally typing comments through my tears. The next day, for some reason unknown to me, I was compelled to pick up and read a book called "Openly Gay, Openly Christian" written by Rev. Samuel Kader. Turns out God spoke to me through that book thanks to the copious quoting of scripture and references to the meaning of the original Hebrew and Greek words. As the barnacles of homophobia were nicked off the ancient texts I was finally able to realise that God made me for who I am, He made me for a purpose, He did not make me as a bundle of going-to-Hell or as an illegal alien from the Outer Darkness, and He does not make mistakes. So once again I can and DO align myself with Jesus Christ as Lord.
By the way, He had a Beloved Disciple.
Homophobes, research your Bibles!
Well anyway, I had come across a bunch of videos about Ex-Gay "ministries" on YouTube. Upon further investigation, I had found they engage in far more destructive techniques, including far more controlling mind-control techniques than Kip McKean could have ever possibly imagined.
The story of one of the "clients" of these "ministries" -- Bryce Faulkner -- really broke my heart. I was literally typing comments through my tears. The next day, for some reason unknown to me, I was compelled to pick up and read a book called "Openly Gay, Openly Christian" written by Rev. Samuel Kader. Turns out God spoke to me through that book thanks to the copious quoting of scripture and references to the meaning of the original Hebrew and Greek words. As the barnacles of homophobia were nicked off the ancient texts I was finally able to realise that God made me for who I am, He made me for a purpose, He did not make me as a bundle of going-to-Hell or as an illegal alien from the Outer Darkness, and He does not make mistakes. So once again I can and DO align myself with Jesus Christ as Lord.
By the way, He had a Beloved Disciple.
Homophobes, research your Bibles!
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